Thursday, September 21, 2017

Did You Super Glue Your Hand? You're Not Alone

Last Wednesday morning, I decided to change a watch strap. The keeper was a little too loose, but I wasn't worried. I have Super Glue!
    By the way--let's add Super Glue to the list of things I shouldn't be allowed to play with.

    I took the keeper off the watch strap, then carefully peeled it open. I grabbed a tube of Super Glue and removed the cap. It was a new tube, which means it was sealed. We have the generic Super Glue, by the way, and unlike the brand name--as I learned--the cap isn't designed to be reversed to puncture the foil cover of the opening.
    I didn't realize that. Holding the tube of glue in my left hand, I reversed the cap and attempted to punch a tiny hole in the glue tube with my right hand. It didn't work easily.
    As a result of not giving up when wisdom dictated I take a different path, I squeezed harder with my left hand and pressed harder into the tube with the cap in my right hand.
    You know physics better than I do, but I should have realized I was building significant pressure on the tube and that "success" would also be failure.
    Sure enough, I succeeded in puncturing the top of the glue as well as succeeded in creating a volcano of Super Glue.
    The Super Glue--which is indeed both super and glue--squirted out all over my right hand.
    I dropped the nearly empty tube in my left hand and plucked the cap out of my right hand.
    Less than a second later, I realized I had--quite successfully--glued my thumb to my index finger, my index finger to my second finger, and my second finger to my third finger. The pinkie remained free and clear in a defiant stand against the oppression of the evil glue.
    I attempted to open my fingers. I was not successful. I wriggled my pinkie like a British lady and found some comfort in the knowledge that I hadn't glued my entire hand together.
    Fortunately, I'm left-handed. I used my left hand to Google how to get Super Glue off when you're dumb enough to seal your fingers together.
    The recommended softening the stuff with nail polish remover.
    As you well know, Tanya doesn't wear nail polish. Neither do I. Fortunately, I found some nail polish remover--which is useful for things other than removing nail polish--in the back of the cabinet in the bathroom.
    As Google suggested, I softened the glue with lots of soap and hot water. When my fingers were pink and puckered--except for the parts in direct contact with the evil glue--I was able to pry them apart.
    I used nail polish remover and scrubbed. It was useless. I had a nice, crispy glaze between each finger
    I was able to chip it off eventually... Took three days!